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I need to go to the Jacks…

Recently, I enjoyed a movie night with my family, watching the 1986 film Short Circuit. I remember going to see this film when it first came out in the cinema. It is filled with humour that all can enjoy. (My dad’s favourite line is, “Great Software.” He’s a computer geek.) Anyway, I have seen this film many times over the years, but I never realised how much toilet humour peppered its lines. One joke in particular I just now understand, and it’s only because of my research into the names for toilet. Near the beginning of the film, Ben is attempting to encourage Newton to attend a reception with military […]

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Overwhelmed with choices: What should I use to wipe my ass?

On a recent trip to the grocery store, my husband and I stood in the middle of the isle where you find all the toilet paper, trying to decide what to actually buy. It’s an isle that runs half the length of the store, and my local grocery store is size of a city block. Honestly, how could there be so many choices out there on what we use to wipe our asses with?

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Where can you find the “plumbing fixtures”?

The toilet is the most utilised room in the house. Some of us are fortunate to have more than one, which is fantastic when there is a large number of people cuing outside the door, yelling at you, telling you to hurry up because they’re busting to go. If your kids are anything like mine, they just open the door and start pulling you off if you don’t move fast enough. (Teenagers… Do they not understand the meaning of the word privacy?)In my recent research into the most important room in a house, I have discovered that there are many names by which we call the toilet. Some are obscure […]

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Descending into the Sewer…

Toilet humour has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. If I think about it, toilet humour has always been around. However, recently I find myself descending into the sewer and following the wastewater through the treatment plant and out to sea. Even as I write that last line, I find myself laughing, the irony not lost.My husband is the Water and Wastewater Treatment Manager for the Christchurch City Council. He has been in the position now for just under a year, and he’s loving every minute of it. He’s a different man to what he was last year, and I love seeing that […]

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Beauty Tips: New or Old Advice?

While on a recent visit to the hair salon, I decided to actually sit down and look at the many magazines they had. I don’t normally do this. I’m either reading a book, or the work of another writer they asked me to review. But the latest issue of the Next magazine sported an article title that caught my eye: The New Beauty Rules: 30s, 40s, 50s & Beyond. So I had to look at what new advice is out there.

I laughed.

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Leaving Home (A Poem)

Migrating birds, flying south. Winter it comes, and they fly south. Wings spread far and wide, Scared they’ll fail, Leaving behind the warmth of the nest. Her babies migrate for the first time alone. Nervous and aflutter, she lets them fly.

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